Additionally my husband didn’t wanted me to wear the hijab, he was kind of freaking out. In my office I was not allowed to wear it either and also my friends didn’t react well. So I chose not to wear it anymore. I stopped muslim dressing for a while, mainly because my husband was totally upset and told me to stop wearing it. The problem in Europe is the total misconception of islam. A woman in Abaya and Hijab (Niqab) is automatically suppressed. But this is nonsense. While I was doing some research I was actually quite impressed to see how many women basically decided to don the hijab without their husbands or families even wanting them to wear it at all. But the misconception and false allegations throughout the world have already polluted people’s minds.
So, as I said, I have not been wearing muslim clothing (loose fit, hijab) for quite a while. But out of a sudden, I started dreaming about wearing abayas, headcoverings etc.. And this time I thought I will surrender to what is even haunting me in my dreams. And as I didn’t want to show my face to anybody, also to avoid discomfort, I decided to go for the niqab (my husband eventually consented because it hides my identity). And I felt very comfortable. In the beginning it was very difficult breathing. But you are getting used to it. Unfortunately I cannot wear jilbab and niqab all the time. I know this is not the correct way, but I am trying my best to wear it as often as possible. But let me make clear to you that I don’t take my Niqab as a fashion statement. I simply feel very secure when I am wearing it. We live in an overly superficial environment where people are only judged by their looks. And I wanted to escape. That is my reason as a non muslim to wear it.
… And maybe this feeling (my dreams) were a hint of god and is bringing me to islam sometime.” -Isabell